Category Archives: girls

on water

World Water Day is Thursday, March 22.

3.575 million people die each year from a water related disease.                                            Women spend 200 million hours a day collecting water.

Water.  Humans are more than 60% water. Our blood is 92% water, the brain and muscles are 75% water, even our bones are about 22% water! Water cleanses our bodies, our belongings. Water keeps us alive. Today, nearly one billion people (that’s one in eight) lack access to clean water.  When we thinkpeace, we thinkwater.

The water we see and feel now is the same ancient water on the earth from the very beginning of time! Our atmosphere draws water into itself, and willingly, constantly gives it all back to the earth time after time after time. When we think of water, we might picture the churning of a beautiful green ocean, or a still quiet lake. Perhaps we see ourselves on the banks of a river that has carved the great canyons, or we feel the mist and see a rainbow appear by a tropical waterfall. We are water, water is us.  We are one and the same.

In her TED talk, Suddenly, My Body, Eve Ensler spoke on her relationship with water after her friend performed a healing ritual to help rid her body of cancer. She said, “It was energy, love and joy. It was all these things, it was all these things, it was all these things, in the water, in the world, in my body.” She felt the hurt, the pain, the healing. She felt the intense connectedness between her body and the earth.

On July 28th 2012, ThinkPeace Workshop’s 4th annual Summer Camp will commence. We couldn’t be more excited!  We have so many amazing things planned for you!  We have been busy this year making incredible connections and dreaming and scheming up rainbows of possibilities, from soulful art projects similar to our story boards last year to making bones for an installation on the National Mall in Washington, D.C., to beginning writing our own stories, and finding our voices to performance art and multi media productions!  Again, this will all take place in Saratoga Springs, NY, a place known for it’s healing springs.  All around the city continual flowing springs are offered as places of healing.  Each one has a separate name and mineral content.  Each one claims to help heal specific ailments. Tasting them, or ‘taking the waters’ as Saratogians call it, is said to promote health, longevity and well being.  These endless springs well up from deep inside the earth and are a large part of what makes Saratoga Springs a special place. At ThinkPeace Workshop summer camp, you will have an opportunity to ‘take the waters’ as a part of connecting with the earth as begin to cultivate your voice, your life. We’ll talk bones and water and girl issues as we embark on our journey to be the change!

Mary Oliver wrote~                                                                                                               At Blackwater Pond the tossed waters have settled

after a night of rain.

I dip my cupped hands. I drink

a long time. It tastes

like stone, leaves, fire. It falls cold

into my body, waking the bones. I hear them

deep inside me, whispering

oh what is that beautiful thing

that just happened?

Come see what can happen at ThinkPeace Workshop for Girls this summer!

you are amazing!

“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.”― Maya Angelou

There is nothing simple about you.  You have an amazing voice inside you.  You think, you feel, you act, you learn, you care.  You are always absorbing and forever becoming.  The best news is that you always will be!  You are never a finished product.  Each experience you have, every person who touches your life, each lesson you learn will add to who you become.

Recently I have read several books by incredible women who, it just so happens, are still becoming.  Who they are today is so not who they imagined themselves to be when they were 14, 24, or 34.  When Leymah Gwobee (Liberian peace activist, Nobel Peace Prize winner and author of Mighty Be Our Powers) was a teenager, she assumed she would graduate from high school and go right off to college.  Then a horrific war broke out and consumed her country and dashed her dreams.  She reinvented herself in her 20s.  And again in her 30s.  Karen Maezen Miller, author of Hand Wash Cold, was certain that she was headed for corporate success and a life without children.  Once she achieved some success in her field, she realized that something was missing.  Her journey led her to become a Buddhist priest AND a mom!  Despite the changes these women have made in their lives, they are also still the girl with the dream and the young woman with the plan.  What they have in common is that they opened themselves up to becoming.  Who we are today isn’t the end , nor is it really the beginning.

You have already had many experiences that have shaped you.  Tomorrow you will have some that might make you reevaluate parts of yourself.  Next year your world could be rocked by some tragedy or some exposure to a new idea.  Five years from now you will think you have it sorta figured out.  And then you won’t.  It’s all good.  It all is a part of the you that is constantly evolving.  The you that is like no other on the planet.  You are amazing.  Maybe it’s time to start keeping a life journal.

Life journals are never ending places to explore who you are in the present moment, what came before, and what is still to come.  It’s never completed.  You can start and restart it over and over, with months or years in between.  The cool thing is that you’ll be able to keep a sort of running dialog going with your self.  The self you were and the self you are– and maybe it will help you along the way.  Recently I picked up mine from years ago and saw that I’m still struggling with some of the same issues I had back in junior high.  I was frustrated that I’m still coping with these parts of myself…and then I realized something new.  I realized that what I struggle with has also become what I am strengthened by and comforted by.  I have used what I have always thought of as my greatest weakness to become a better friend and a much better parent.  That thing that gnawed at me since childhood has made me create a different life for myself than if I hadn’t acknowledged it.  I love knowing that I am still growing, still becoming.  I wonder who I’ll be, how I will change and how I will stay the same, in ten years.  Wow, I just felt something.  Once again, I feel connected to my 14 year old self.  I like her!

You are a girl.  An interesting, deep, fascinating and unique human being.  Share YOU with yourself and then– with others!  Sarah McLachlan sings, “Life is like a gift they say, wrapped up for you everyday.   Open up and find a way, to give some of your own.” What you have to give is special.  Afterall, you are amazing.

 

I do? Not.

Try to imagine for a moment…you are a 14 year old girl who hasn’t tasted life yet!  You’ve just begun to blossom.  You want an opportunity for an education.  You want to play.  You want to have a voice that is heard.  You want to be healthy and feel safe.  You want to be counted, literally.  But you aren’t.  You don’t have a birth certificate.  There is no record that you exist.  You rely solely on your family to make decisions that will impact the rest of your life.  You have no choice.

Your husband was chosen by the time you were 5.  You are lucky that you were able to stay with your family until you are 14.  But now, it’s your wedding day.  Your groom is 37.  You’ve never had a conversation.  He doesn’t know that you’re good at math or interested in medicine.  He doesn’t know that you like to read or paint or play an instrument.  He doesn’t know that you are already tired from all the work you do for your family every day.  He doesn’t realize that you are still a child.  This is normal.  This is life… in the developing world one in seven girls is married before the age of 15.

According to Girls Not Brides, “Child marriage is a global problem that cuts across countries, cultures, religions and ethnicities. Child brides can be found in every region in the world, from the Middle East to Latin America, South Asia to Europe.  Region by region, half of all the world’s child brides live in South Asia where 46% of girls are married before they reach 18. Child marriage rates are 66% in Bangladesh, 39% in Afghanistan and 47% in India – where the sheer size of the population, at over 1 billion, means that many millions of girls are affected. Every other region is affected too, from Sub-Saharan Africa, where the child marriage rate is 38% overall, to Latin America and the Caribbean, where the rate stands at 29% (UNICEF, 2011).”

Working to end child marriages means addressing major issues such as poverty, traditional values, gender roles, and security.  The solutions lie in empowering girls, educating communities and families, improving girls’ access to education, providing economic incentives and changing laws.  Child marriage violates girls’ fundamental human rights.  The time has come.  We must work together to put an end to this practice and protect girls around the world.  “We can end child marriage NOW.  Let girls be girls, not brides,” Desmond Tutu.

At a recent thinkpeace meeting girls learned about this practice and were deeply affected.  We have reached out to various organizations such as Girls Not Brides, Girl Up and DoSomething.org to learn more and to become a part of the solution.  Thinkpeace girls played at getting married:  they fashioned wedding dresses out of crepe paper, had wedding cake, laughing with each other all the while.  But then they were shown photos of their “grooms” and were told they’d have a baby within a year.  The fun ended when reality hit.  There are tough issues to discuss surrounding child marriage but we know that together, we can make a difference.  Talking about it is just the beginning.

Imagine…you’re a 14 year old girl with a future.

The wedding photo

 

 

 

who are you, who who?

Without self knowledge, the understanding of the universe remains incomplete. -Deepak Chopra

You probably think you know exactly who you are right now, today.  It’s easy enough to define yourself with labels.  When I was in high school I would have said:  I am a blonde girl.  I am a cheerleader.  I am a good student.  I am sensitive.   I am creative.  I am somebody’s girlfriend.  I am a sister.  I am a daughter.  If you asked me to go deeper I might have said:  I am messy. I am overweight.  I am afraid.  I am confused.  That would have stopped me right there; I wouldn’t have wanted to go any further down that road.  The negative attributes I assigned myself would have made me realize that I preferred to identify myself as a bubbly blonde cheerleader.  That felt better.

The problem with not really knowing ourselves is that until we do, we can’t really understand others.  So how do we get there?  I have to tell you:  it’s hard.  It’s especially hard when you’re trying to fit in.  I was talking to a high school guidance counselor the other day who told me that 9th grade is the hardest year, in her opinion, for girls in high school.  “They so desperately want to fit in somewhere that they will define themselves just to fit the characteristics of a group– so they feel that they belong somewhere.”  The result is that girls will often change who they really are deep inside just to fit this idea of what they should look like, act like, be like… They will suddenly change their hair color or start smoking.  They’ll carry the same tote bag as every other girl in the group and wear the same clothes, no matter how it looks on them.  They’ll get a boyfriend, because everyone has one.  They’ll pick on other kids in the cafeteria, because that’s how to look cool.  They’ll join teams, not because they love the sport, but because it gives them an identity– and an established group.  It’s understandable.  It feels better to belong than to walk alone.

If we stop and ask ourselves, do I want to dress like everyone else…  If we ask ourselves, how did I feel inside when I saw that girl getting teased at lunch and I said nothing to stop it… If we ask ourselves, do I like myself better when I’m in a posse, with a boyfriend, smoking on the corner… what would the answers be?  Where and when in our lives do we get to be our true selves?  How would it feel to JUST BE YOU?

At thinkpeace workshops we often ask girls, what stirs your soul??  Too often we are met with blank stares or hung heads and “I don’t knows”.  We want you to ask yourself questions, constantly.  Are you creative?  Are you a people person?  Do you get absorbed by a good book?  Does performing light a fire in you?  Do you feel outrage at social injustices?  Do you feel lonely sometimes?  Do you love to create masterpieces in the kitchen?  Is a soccer goal the best feeling in the world to you?  Does your pet soothe you and make you giggle?  Does music make you emotional?  Do you want to dress like a hippie or a rebel or super comfy or all blinged out or all of the above?  Do you want to sit at lunch with the kid being picked on?  Are you living the life YOU want to live?  WHO are YOU?  Really, people are like snowflakes:  no two are exactly alike.  So why do we try so hard to BE alike?

The thing is, when you truly know yourself (remembering that you are always a work in progress and always changing!), you’ll see that there is so much to like and that there are things that will frustrate you or make you sad.  None of us are perfect; we are all flawed.  That’s actually what makes us more interesting.   And it’s how we tap into our compassionate selves.  The girl who knows her passions and her goals and what makes her giddy can reach out to another and say, try this!  The girl who knows her sadnesses and anxieties and insecurities can reach out to another and say, you are not alone.  It’s the girl who knows herself who will change the world, because she understands it and sees herself in it.

Oneness

Imagine a world where every girl believes she has a unique gift…

Imagine a world where every girl feels heard and valued…

Imagine a world where every girl believes, deep in her heart, that she matters…

Imagine a world where every girl has access to an education, health care and equal opportunity…

 

For so long our world has been divided into categories:  nations, religions, ethnicities, genders, and economic boundaries. These lines have divided us for so long that we struggle to come together, even at the peace table.  What if there was another way?  Last night I followed a disturbing thread on a friend’s Facebook wall which began with a peaceful message of hope for the people of Turkey (following the news of the devastating earthquake there) and ended with judgement and negativity.  It was an interesting “conversation” about national borders, why we have them, their importance and limitations, etc.  It made me wonder about the different types of borders that exist all around us.

By definition, border means a dividing line.  For humanity it means that there are edges, or sides.  It separates us from our neighbors, friends and enemies, and creates an egocentric society.  What if, instead, we created a society based on our deep interconnectedness, and the common thread of the Golden Rule of mutual respect.  Today is the Global Day of Oneness, which asks us all to share our greatest gifts which will lead to peace and creativity, prosperity and joy.  It asks us to embrace humanity as good and see that the only way to change the world really, is to change ourselves; believe in ourselves and in others.  Global Oneness requires us to step over the borders in our lives and practice tolerance and acceptance.

If we recognize that human beings need each other to survive on this planet, then we see that we are all in this together.   Our communities will flourish as we learn about each other and celebrate our differences.   To place a border where there could be a simple understanding and appreciation for uniqueness seems so rigid, so final.  A border establishes a line between people that says, I must protect what is mine and you can have what is yours…unless, of course, I want what you have…then I want to fight over that border.  We expect our children to share.  Is it so hard for us to share as adults?  If we are all in this together, we must continue to honor that core value of mutual respect.

The time for change is now.  The people who wrote on my friend’s wall last night about protecting our borders weren’t interested in an open dialogue.  They believed that hatred justified nationalism and the necessity of borders.  If only they could open their hearts and minds for a moment and see that we all breathe the same air and want our children and animals and environment to grow and be healthy.  We are in fact, one family on this planet. As a family, the time has come to discuss openly, celebrate joyfully, and fully accept ourselves and one another.

 

What a Girl Wants

What does a girl really want?  Sure, a shopping spree would be nice.  In many parts of the world some clean water, a warm meal, and a safe home is wanted desperately.  Let’s go inside a girl…beneath the material wants and the basic human needs.  What does a girl want for her self, her heart and soul?

Across all socio-economic borders and ethnicities girls want to know that they matter.  Every girl wants to know that it is okay to be exactly who she is:  serious and silly, strong and tender, capable and still learning.  She is emotional.  She is reserved.  She is outgoing and she is shy.  What a girl wants is to have her voice count.  She wants to be accepted, as a girl and as a human being.

What a girl really wants is for you to look closer and listen more deeply.  She wants to be known. Even the quiet girl who hangs in the background is longing to be seen.  Even the rowdy cheerleader is aching to be heard.  What a girl wants is to know that her inner voice has value.  It does.